#3 Wednesday Round-Up

12.19.2022 holiday edition, bxtches!

December 19, 2022

Happy Wednesday! (It’s Tuesday, but I’m impatient)

Since my first newsletter, I have learned some things. In no particular order:

  1. I would love to have the discipline to release this newsletter weekly and on the same day each week.

  2. I do not have the discipline to release this newsletter weekly and on the same day each week.

  3. Writing this newsletter makes me feel happy. 

  4. Hearing from people who read it also makes me feel happy! I LOVE when y’all write to me about which parts you loved and what you’ve tried.

  5. I don’t know much about online platforms or how to make things look nice & sleek & cool, but I’m loving the process. 

  6. Like teaching, there is a tricky balance between making something consistent enough so that people can trust / get used to it AND changing what isn’t working. I will be playing with that balance / format some in the coming issues and hope that’s okay with y’all! Bear with me —  I’m trying. :) 

  7. Having this newsletter gives me motivation to try new things & get out of my house, which my therapist loves for me.

  8. There are actually so many fun, cool, fulfilling things out there that are free or cheap. Take that, consumer culture!

Okay, onto what you all came here for…

Listening Round Up 

I listened to this episode when I was visiting family in Texas —  I have the strong memory of cleaning up my clothes around the air mattress and it being the most entertaining thirty minutes and four seconds of my day. If you aren’t familiar with RadioLab, it’s a radio program, and now podcast, that was originally hosted by Jad Abumrad and Robert Krulwich and is currently hosted by Lulu Miller and Latif Nasser. It’s a show that does a deep dive into something (usually science or culture related) and interviews people who are experts in that specific thing. The audio production and editing is incredible and the topics are fascinating. This one happens to be about Neanderthals and Crohn's disease, and I am actually not going to say any more. Enjoy.  ⭐⭐⭐⭐

🎧  RadioLab: Butt Stuff (Podcast)

Another Radiolab episode recommendation! This one is probably one of my favorites (up there with their Patient Zero episode about “Typhoid Mary”). The episode is about butts, sure, but it digs into a sort-of timeline / exploration of how clothing for women went from being uniquely made to fit each woman’s individual body (think of the modiste from Bridgerton taking specific measurements for each woman) to becoming mass-produced with the advent of machines à la the Industrial Revolution. The plot twist (for me) was how big of a role the eugenics movement played in the decisions garment-makers made when determining the sizes they would offer…and how big of a role it still plays in the current fashion and textile landscape (as well as the ever raging war against people’s bodies…against difference…) ⭐⭐⭐⭐

This playlist was curated by Lily after the end of daylight savings time this Fall. It comprises of mostly local “babe bands” —  folksy and nostalgic and lovely. ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Watching Round Up

🎬 The Devil’s Hour (Amazon Prime, Miniseries, Psychological Thriller, 2022)

This miniseries was suggested to me by my father. My dad is a natural born puzzler; he tinkers with plots and motives and seems to always know whodunit only moments after the exposition is set. So, when he recommended this thriller, I had to give it a go. I watched the first episode with my friend Amanda (shoutout), and both of us admitted we couldn’t have watched it alone in the dark. (I finished the series alone, but, in broad daylight whilst folding clothes). The premise of this mind bending, six-episode series, is that a woman wakes from a dream every night at 3:33 AM. In the dream, her face is bloodied and she is having a conversation with a man from across a metal interrogation table. Outside of the dream, she struggles to function amid her insomnia, recent separation from her husband, and the chilling and sometimes frightening behavior of her eight-year-old son who seems incapable of showing any emotion at all.  ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Reading Round-Up

📰 Reparenting Yourself by Not Pushing Yourself (article, Psychology Today)

“saying no and choosing easy can be an act of self-care and good-enough” ⭐⭐⭐

My friend Hilary sent me this article a few days ago, and it was one of those situations where someone says what you need to hear or does what you need to witness at exactly the right time. These holiday weeks have been brutal y’all, I’m not gonna lie. For anyone who grew up in a dysfunctional home or who has wounding around family or separation, the holidays can feel like being the sole survivor in any of the Saw films: emerging from grotesque little challenges that don’t kill you but definitely don’t make you stronger. (Why was that ever a phrase!??!) I’m coming to learn that trauma doesn’t make me stronger —  healing from it does.

So did I have 3 separate therapy sessions in 7 days? Yes. Because I am learning how to take better care of myself, okay? Also, as a recovering perfectionist, having chosen to take extended time off from work (#sabbaddiecal) means that if I’m not vigilant, the voice in my head will tell me I am not doing enough, that I am lazy, that I am entitled, that I need to be producing something or serving someone in order to have value, that I am…bad. But guess what? I had those same thoughts when I was working too! Choosing the easy way (quit!), choosing what I want (to stay home and not go to that party), choosing to honor myself (take a dance class), is actually the hardest thing for me to do. But I’m proud of all the ways in which I have done it this year and the ways in which I continue to try despite the water we all swim in.  ⭐⭐⭐

Field-Trip Round-Up (SF Bay Area)

👟 Huckleberry Botanic Regional Preserve (7087 Skyline Blvd, Oakland, CA 94611)

I discovered this short— but gorgeous— nature walk by literally opening Google Maps and typing in “trees near me.” So, like, suffice it to say I’m not your resident expert on nature-girl activities BUT I do love being outside. And my therapist has been on my ass about LeAvInG tHe aPaRtMeNt so… to the forest I went! I saw “Huckleberry” when I zoomed in on the map, and because I have fond memories eating huckleberry pancakes in rural Montana every summer of my childhood, I decided to check it out.

The whole preserve feels like the Land Before Time — like a velociraptor could whooosh by at any moment. Walking through the prehistorically breathtaking manzanitas and enormous, vibrant ferns is the remedy the doctor ordered for your (my) major depressive disorder. If you are a local kid, go play outside here! It’s a 2-ish mile loop, I believe. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Cooking Round-Up:

🧁 Holiday Spritz Cookies (Life, Love, and Sugar)

My Auntie Jen makes spritz cookies every year, but this year I didn’t want to bug her for her recipe (I somehow never save family recipes? It’s a problem). So I just clicked the recipe Google suggested, and everyone at the Holiday Party loved them, okay? You will need a cookie press (sometimes called a cookie gun) and you can buy them from any kitchen store like Williams-Sonoma, Sur la Table, or yeah, of course, Amazon. Here are some snags I ran into, however. Learn from my mistakes! ⭐⭐⭐⭐

  1. Put your sprinkles / nonpareils on before putting cookies in the oven (duh, but like, I didn’t know that and honestly there is no shame in not knowing the first time).

  2. If your dough is not sticking to the pan: freeze your pans and do not grease or line them with any parchment paper or anything. 

  3. If your dough is not coming out of the press: your dough is too cold. Warm it by putting the bowl inside of a bigger bowl of warm water. If your kitchen is cold or you decided to get fast a loose with the recipe and chill it because you fancy yourself a Great British Baking Show contestant, come back to Earth for a moment and warm up your dough. (I know it’s counterintuitive, but please just trust me). 

  4. These cookies bake FAST. So set a timer! Make sure you have extra baking sheets that you are freezing while batches bake in the oven. When you take out the cookies from the oven, press the next batch on the freezing sheet. Once the new sheet of cookies goes in, take the warm cookies off the hot baking sheets, put them on a cooling rack, and plop those hot baking sheets in the freezer. This way, you are always rotating sheets and you are always pressing cookies on COLD cookie sheets. 

💃 Moving Round-Up

I met Talia after taking one of her (and I am not making this name up) “Shimmy Pop” classes at Hipline in Oakland at the height of the pandemic in 2020. She would teach in the Trader Joe’s parking lot perpendicular to the commercial dumpster while new mothers wearing their infants in babybjorns, eager octogenarians just happy to be there, and I dropped it low under the irritated gaze of people just trying to find a place to park their SUVs. It sounds chaotic, but things were so bleak back then that it was actually the highlight of my week.

Because she is wonderful, Talia has many dance classes recorded and available for free on Youtube. Her energy is incredible, and this is the only workout I’ve ever been able to do on my own at home. I just love it! If you’re local, check out her schedule! Nothin’ beats an in-person class with Talia! ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Style Round-Up

Would you like to give a loved one the gift of hand-made jewelry this holiday season? Good thing my soulmate, best friend, and college roommate makes jewelry!

Tessa Creates explores intimacy and delight through beadwork. Using vintage beads, upcycled charms, semi-precious stones and hand-drilled shale from the shores of Lake Champlain, Tessa builds unique, dynamic and elegant jewelry. Find your one of a kind and/or custom piece at tessabarlow-ochshorn.com/tessa-creates or on IG @tessa.creates ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Laughing Round-Up

I come back to this interview…a lot. Jason Segel and Paul Rudd are you and your best friend after you’ve both smoked a bowl and/or are sleep deprived but have to speak to someone who doesn’t speak the language of your friendship. It is everything. And it warms me up whenever I am feeling blue. I can’t take off my hat…It’s a mental compulsion. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Some acknowledgements this week: 

  • My Barnacles: Liz, Savannah, Amber, Cecelia, Serena, Ray, and Yuli. Our bookclub (how reductionist!) has become a sanctuary for me, and I love each of you so deeply.

  • Lana: seeing your videos and nerding out over harry potter fanfiction has been a flame of warmth in this long, bleak winter. u rock nvr change.

  • Devon, Alicia, Lily and Amanda — after a week of fairly intense hibernation I saw you all back to back from 4pm on Friday to 4pm on Sunday, and even though I am an introvert and couldn’t move for 5 hours afterwards, it was the highlight of my entire week.

  • My older sister: for cycle breaking without a blueprint, and doing it anyways.

*Ending note*

An archive of these newsletters can be found on my new website, www.sabbaddiecal.com, under “Wednesday Roundups.” If you want to pop over there and also read some longer-form pieces that aren’t listicles, they can be found under “Journals.”

Squarespace is pretty expensive and unfortunately requires an additional paid subscription to be able to send newsletters so, for now, I am going to continue to send the newsletter through Substack but store the archives on my site! Any tips with a cheap / sleek / non-annoying web presence you wanna send my way would be…appreciated.

Also, the next newsletter may be called Sabbaddiecal Roundup because obviously Wednesdays are not happening.

XO,

M